ok, now 3 months

I realized that I was a little hasty last week in saying 3 months. Now its 3 months.

so I don't know if thanksgiving is this week or the last, but they don't celebrate it here. In fact, when I tried to explain it to someone they didn't understand why we stuffed ourselves and watch football to give thanks. shes got a point.

To answer questions. last week I went into the office, so when I was there I plugged in my pendrive to the computer to download the 1000 songs they have. I am just using my comps speakers.

I didn't have a conversation with Elder Rigby, so I have not told him about how my mother stalked him. Yes I talked to Elder mcswain about the bangerters! I was like, yeah they are in my ward! me and emily are friends! He was like, isn't she like 13? Haha funny stuff. 

so mom, about that time our for women thing, how in the world did you get grandma to hold up that fake mustache???? hahahahahahahahahaha sooooooo funny!!!

so I tried my home debit card this week, and it worked. I withdrew about 25 bucks. so lemme know if someone is coming down to arrest me for fraud or anything.

so we have been having problems with getting our clothes back from the people who wash them. let's just say I have been wearing the same pair of socks for 4 days now. Yeah. haha

There is a word here that they use to mean child, creatura. literal translation means creature. so like, the creatures are playing outside. super funny.

lauren, thank you for the letters! I got a bunch more this week! Including the Rm application which made me and many other people laugh very hard.

so mom, I am sorry, I don't wear my seatbelt here. That's only because there is never anything to clip it into. None work. I apologize.

Ok, so there was a wedding and baptism of the other missionaries in our ward this week! super cool! Only like 35 people were there, it was in the church gym, and the only decorations were some boquets and a heart made out of balloons. It was really more of a formality, seeing as they already have kids who are adults. The wedding favors included hotdogs, and sprite. Elegance at its finest.

so I had a cool experience this week. I was sitting in a lesson teaching the Restoration, and whenever we teach this lesson satan always sends a distraction, a crying baby, anything. This time it was in the form of a barking dog. for half of the lesson this dog was barking and making noise. finally I thought to myself to do something, and I knew that it was good, so I had the faith, probably not fully, to do it. I turned and said to the dog, in English, Be still. That's all I said. and you know what? That dog did not bark nor make one noise for the rest of the lesson. Incredible. I am just grateful to my Father in Heaven for showing me that I do have the power and authority to act in the name of christ, and I grew such a greater respect for this divine calling I am on. Truly, even though no one saw, this was a miracle for me.

Happy anniversary on the 30th mom and dad! Whatre you at, 25?

Here is a lot like West Bountiful. Everyone is related somehow. super funny.

so I had a good trade this week. I traded this guy named jose my watch that he really wanted for his classic, 50 dollar Olimpia jersey. Then I went and bought a cool white watch for 5 bucks. Haha good trade right? Its a super cool jersey, I took a pic, I will send it later.

I had a lesson in English! This guy is a less active member and he teaches English and studies it. His english is probably as good as my spanish. But he wanted to speak in English! so we talked about the tree of life, and it was fun to be the lead companion for once, and to be able to say what I want to say! It was super weird at first, I kept wanting to go into spanish!! funny.

so in spanish there are words that they just use in English, and some are random.

chance (pronounced wrong, but still English)

look (as in my look is a white shirt and tie)

break, as in lets take a break for a while

fetch, among members this is popular because of north american missionaries

okay. everyone says ok.

so on the buses, the collectivos, there are people that try to sell you stuff. candy, food, magazines, beer (which they call leche, or milk), jewlery, coloring books, you name it. some even pass out the candy, then you have to wait til they return so you can give them it back, because if you eat it, you pay for it. Haha it should be illegal. But hey, its funny.

Well I love you all, thanks for all the support you all give me! I pray for your safety and happiness. 

Remember how powerful the Book of mormon is. If this book is true, our whole church is true. If this book is true, everything we say and do is true. This is fundemental to everything we teach. Without a testimony of the Book of mormon we just cannot gain a testimony of anything else. It's important.

Yall are great, hope you enjoyed the show, until next time...

Elder jake

 

 

This was the district for the first change.

from left to right, Elder hathaway, Breton, me, funk, Herrera being dumb, and wing, who is home now.

Hermana willis, alania, sanchez, tomco, santos, puac, linares, hunt, and villanueva above hunt.

 

 This is such a great picture.

 

 

 my Halloween package!! oh the joy! It was all gone in like 3 days.

Cows in the street and watermelon on heads

Wow. 3 months. Unreal. It has not been that long.

So great about Zayah!! I am super proud of him. That made me so happy!

Well I don't have many questions to answer, which is ok, I have stuff to write. Always. Sorry for no pics again.

First of all, random cows roam the street. We try to avoid them because some have some nice horns.

I spitshined my shoes the other day real quick on the way out the door and my comp was super confused. I had to explain to him what spitshining was. He asked me if I do the same thing with my hair. Haha super funny, I never thought it would be so weird. He also has all these presumptuous thoughts about the USA from movies and reality tv, that all kids spit at their parents and all rebel all crazy and stuff. I try to tell him that reality tv is really the crazies, but he assures me that he "knows what the US is like" and that Utah is probably just different. Silly him.

I got music!! Oh how is sooths my soul. I love it.

We saw a lady walking with a watermelon balancing on her head. Super cool.

The culture here is very Catholic, and they believe in a bunch of Virgins and the Child Jesus mostly. It's hard cuz its their culture, so when we ask them to change, we are asking them to shirk their culture. Its hard.

I bought a hymnbook! then lost it... Rats.

We had the meeting with Christofferson! He spoke in perfect Spanish! Wow. I got to shake his hand! I also asked him a question, I asked him how the Gospel had helped him in his life. It was weird cuz everyone else asked about investigators or how to teach, but I just wanted to know that!

I met Elders McSwain and Rigby! Super cool guys.

Its funny in the mornings when its like 60 degrees and everyone has beanies and coats. Haha silly Paraguayans think its cold.

Super cool member Baptism this week. We filled the font, but the water looked like lemonade. So we cleaned it out and filled it again, grabbing buckets and filling in sinks to hurry it up. Super funny and fun! She will have a great story to tell.

Well I gotta go, it is short this week, I didn't have my full 2 hours. 

WEll remember everyone that Jesus Christ suffered for us one by one. One by one he felt our pains, one by one he suffered our guilts, one by one he thought of us in the Garden. He loves us. 

With all my imperfect yet sincere love for you all, Elder Jake

In the groove now

so I feel like I just was here! Wow so fast. I feel like I just left the airport. Boy how much more confident I feel however.

I always forget what I have already said in these letters, sorry if I repeat anything ever.

so I see it is snowing! I miss snow. I wanna go sledding. Oh good times. I remember all my extreme sledding injuries. Oh those were the days.

more packages!! Yay! I like those. They make me happy.

I am talking to Noah a touch more now, he had told me stuff about it. Its fun to talk to him super shortly.

Its fun to here about all these things! jackie getting home.. crazy sauce. cassi in china? wow. Thats super cool, I can't wait to see the list of the missions of people. How is casey doing on his mission stuff?

so the guy who had ants crawl on his feet is named vidal. super cool guy. We asked him what is the book of mormon? he said, True! haha he just has a problem getting to church. But he knows so much, he has read more in the Book of mormon than most of the members here.

laurie clark, happy birthday this week, I am sorry I forgot what day exactly, but I am pretty sure its this week.

I got a letter from one rachel sandorf this week! If this one rachel sandorf would kindly email me we could talk much more easily. Thanks Rach!

mom, in my bucket of stuff in the bottom I belief I have my prayer rug from forever ago. The next time you send something, could you send that? That'd be lovely. I would love that.

my comp is a convert since 10, but really he says he was a punk and not active good member til 18. he is 20 now, a year into his mission. He is from a more rich part of columbia, I think his family is quite wealthy actually. I havent seen his letters or packages if he has gotten them. His fam are all members I think.

I will send pictures slowly, I gotta do it in order so I don't miss any I wanted to send. I am slowly catching up. I have taken pics of the apartment and stuff, but I havent sent them. also, we don't take cameras out proselyting cuz well, a tall well dressed american with a camera is a big target for people who lack sufficient funds.

so to tell you all how it is here, I will be quite plain and clear. It has been the hardest 5 weeks of my life. But I have grown so much more confident. I know the lord works for the best, and sometimes I feel like I am being put through the ringer. But hey, I have a ways to go right? Insert winky face here.

The truth is, most of the stress relief I had at home isn't here. I have had to learn new ways. I can't go talk to alex, I can't shoot hoops with mckay, I can't sit and play guitar, I can't listen to kevins comedianisms, I can't text friends, I can't even just stop to rest in my bed most of the time. That is the hardest part about out here. learning new ways of relieving stress. like working harder. Oh the faith that I lack still sometimes. my God knows me. He knows my lazy tendencies. It's for the best. 

come what may, and love it.

Whats it like at home without me? less stress? are you saving tons of money on cheesesticks and pretzals and frosting?

may I touch on the subject of the incredible strength of my mother.

let me just say, that I have not seen a stronger woman in the world than my mother. When she got called to be the Relief society Pres and then a few weeks later got diagnosed with cancer, I wasn't sure how she was going to take it. When surgeries followed and she couldn't do very much for a while, she still made cards for the people who gave us food and snacks and treats. she still talked to sis mckenzie and helped her. she came to soccer games, climbed hills, all these things she did to support her family and friends when really she was the one who needed the support. along with other experiences that she has been through with different things, I am so proud of my mom. she is an incredible woman. sorry mom, I am sure you cannot read this far because your vision is going blurry, if I know you at all. my mom really is my hero. I never really have had a hero until now, but I look back and see all that she and so many other people have done for me and I am just incredibly grateful. 

You all are the reason I am here. You helped me to get here. Now I am here and I get to do the same for others. What a blessing it is.

sidenote, whats Bishop salmons email? thanks.

Ok, back to life in Paraguay.

dogs. there are like 5 per household. crazy. they breed like no other.

I created an Excel sheet for references the other day. Who knew computer tech would come in handy?

modesty is a huge issue here. The men don't wear shirts a lot, the women really arent modest either. You can tell who the mormons are in the street.

can you send some magic korean no itch stuff? Is there any? Idk thatd be grand.

a lot of times there is juice that people handmake. The problem is there is always pulp. and its hard for me to drink stuff with pulp. They also all share cups. Exciting.

The other day we ate undercooked scones essentially. and yall know how much I get sick with scones. so I tried to down it with juice, which tasted like cough syrup. That was not a happy day. we went home and ate something else.

fail of justin beiber in paraguay, he comes out for a concert and says, hola uruguay! People hate him now.

I heard the jonas brothers the other day! that was fun.

people here legitly play volleyball without hands. super cool.

my companion does P90x in the mornings, and it always reminds me of the Byutv studio c sketch about it. Haha I hate it, but I love it! seriously, he says that.

There is a soccer rivalry here, cerro and olimpia, they played yesterday and tied. no one is happy. but hey, no revolts or loud cheers last night.

saturday was a long day. We took this kid marcello who we haven't taught him anything, but he wanted to come with us to teach, so we brought him along! We walked all afternoon, probably 10 miles, and we couldn't find anyone to teach, all the appointments fell through, poor kid probably didn't know what he had gotten himself into. But hey he came to chruch this sunday!! I wasn't expecting that. He is a stud. He is gonna be my first baptism, I know it.

 

Well I will end with a good quote that I thought of a while ago

"Some things in life are so sweet that they change our perception of sweet altogether."  me!

love you all. Thanks for the support. You all are the reason I am here, and more. keep up the work.

With all the love my imperfect heart can muster, 

Elder Jake

 

 I thought that this selfy was shweet. me and templo buenos aires!

 

This is the other district in the ccm.         right to left, going on top

Elders white, boyer, dye (best missionary ever), bronson, teloma, ricci behind, I can't remember the names of the two shorter elders to the left, we called them timon and pumba. I will look that up later. The hermanas from left to right, dolan, buss, hunt. hma hunt is in my district now.

a month in Paraguay? get out..

so first of all, I apologize for my capitilization and such, this is a weird keyboard. The shift key only works sometimes.

You all are incredible. I quite enjoyed your pumpkin pictures!! alexs temple and pumpkin eating another pumpkin was grand, kevins minion was incredible, and all reminded me of home so much! Good stuffs!

I have talked to Noah a touch, but it sounds cold out there! as its getting to 100 and humid here! definitely gonna be thinking of him! We will bring the world his truth, surely.

mom, don't you remember, you sent me with 20 bottles of contact solution? If i need soap, meds, contact solution I am sure, anything I need I can get here. Besides frosting and pretzals and cheesesticks. and home. but hey, what are these 2 hours for? and no I have not found peanut butter, but then again I have not looked very hard. I usually just buy ham and cheese and bread and eggs. We always have lunches with people.

I am glad all is well there! You will have to get me matts email.

I got my halloween package on Halloween! What luck! I also got tons of letters from the last month. 5 from lauren, 1 from mallory, and 1 from grandma and grandpa simpson. someone help them figure out how to email me. Oh and the little newspaper snipit from Grm k!

so this package made me very happy. let me tell you why.

first thing I saw was my moms handwriting, and that made me very happy.

Then the pretzals. OHHHHH the joy!! always send pretzals!! I am slowly enjoying the greatness. The peeps I was like, ok I will just eat one. But no, you cannot just eat one peep. Before I could take another breath they were gone. Ohhhh goodness.

The hammer screwdriver thing is super cool! super funny how small it gets!

Perry the platypus Pez. I will keep this forever. forever being 2 years. I did a little patience experiment with the pez, because on my attributes test, patience was the lowest. I ate one pez and made myself wait for increasing increments of time to eat the next one. When it got too easy, I began to hold the pez in my hand for the whole hour I was studying. This whole experiment took two days. The hardest part was the next day, I was like, this is dumb, I just wanna eat it! But no, I made myself do one at a time. It was so hard! But hey, maybe it helped.

lauren, if you have written my every week then I am missing two letters that must be at the mtc from sep 10 and 17. I did not recieve the Rm application or those other things.

for all those wishing to send me a real letter, it takes 2 to 8 weeks to get here, so plan accordingly! Here is a funny thing I found about letter sending, it is kinda long, and a lot of you have written me emails which is the fastest and really easiest way to talk to me, because I will not write handwritten letters often, they cost 3 bucks each to send. so here is this, it may not apply, but its funny anyways.

The first epistle of Elder simpson to the dead letter writers.

chapter 1

IN the beginning was the mailbox and the mailbox was void of letters.

2 and the missionaries said, "let the mailbox be filled" and the box was not filled.

3 and the missionaries beheld the continuing void and were not pleased.

4 and lo, it was the first day of the first week and there was no mail delivered, but this was good.

5 But on the second day was the mail delivered, yet the box remained empty.

6 Yea, even from the second day unto the seventh was the mail delivered.

7 Even so, the box retained its void.

8 and yea, great mists of darkness spread forth from the void and enshrouded the missionaries. Yea, and did bring much sadness to their otherwise cheery days.

9 Even the long hours of fruitless tracting, being attacked by the fowls of the air, and being pursued by the beasts of the field were not as desheartening as the lack of blessed objects know as letters.

10 Yet they persisted.

chapter 2

AND, lo, on the second day of the second week the mists still encircled the mailbox.

2 and on the third day, from within the depths of the void was a single postcard.

3 and this postcard put forth a ray of light that pierced the darkness and overcame the mists.

4 and the missionaries were well pleased, and there was much rejoicing.

5 But, alas, their exclamations of joy were in vain. for the postcard was for someone else.

6 but if their joy was so exceedingly great over someone elses mail, how great would be their joy at partaking of their own mail?

chapter 3

BUT some will say, a letter, a letter, We have already written a letter. We have no need to write any more letters.

2 know ye not that there are more days than one, and more events tham one in a day? Why think ye that these events need no be reported?

3 Yea, and ye need not worry that your letters will go unanswered.

4 But you should say, I will go and write the letter tha a missionary requests. for I know that he giveth no requests except he be prepared to speedily respond.

5 and we give unto thee the parable of the self addressed envelopes.

6 When the missionary departed into the far off land he gave a certain number of self addressed stamped envelopes to his friends.

7 Unto one he gave five, unto another he gave two, and unto the third he gave one.

8 and while he was gone, he that was given the five envelopes wrote five letters, then in his zeal wrote five letters more.

9 The same with him that had two enveloples, He wrote two letters and the two letters more.

10 But he that was given the single self addressed envelope became slothful and careless. and he lost the envelope, even that which he was given.

11 and when the missionbary came home he went unto his friends. nd he that had written ten letters he warmly greeted.

12. The smae with him that had written four letters.

13 But he that had written none at all was given nothin more than a fishy, wimplike handshake.

chapter 4

AND the missionary said unto his friend, lovest thou me?

2 nd the friend said, of course I love thee. Then the missionary said, fill my mailbox.

3 He saith a second time, friend, lovest thou me? and the friend said, thou knowest that I love thee. He then said, fill my mailbox.

4 He then spake a third time saying, lovest thou me? nd the friend said, thou knowest that I love thee!

5 Then the missionary said, stuff my mailbox.

6 and the vision is become unto all as the words of a letter that is sealed in the envelope that men deliver to one who is not serving a mission saying, Read this, I pray thee, and he saith, I cannot, for it is sealed and it is not mine.

7 and the letter is deliverd to him that is serving a mission saying, read this I pray thee, and he saith, why sure.

8 Therefore you should proceed to do a marvelous work for a missionary, even a marvelous work and a wonder by writing a letter.

That is all. Yeah I thought it was funny too.

One thing I could use, mom, is recipies. I cant find my book. can i get recipies for crepes, brownies, choco chip cookies, and sugar cookies? just in case i have some extra time on pday to have fun.

I laughed hard in one of laurens letters talking about mom. I guess mom asked 

with all this modern technology, why cant they make bandaids for black people?

and also

I am not playing!! (after a ball hit the window)

hahaha oh mom, I love you so.

Halloween, I saw a few trick or treaters with their parents, mostly dressed up like witches and stuff. there are a few clothes and stuff with halloween, but its not big here. people know it is all.

I finally saw a good sunset! Oh it was beautiful. I wanted to just sit and watch it and pull up a cowboy hat and play my guitar. This place is gonna make a hick out of me.

We taught this man who had bugs crawling all over his feet. like they lived in the wounds that were there. he didnt even seem to care. Ew. poor guy is getting eaten!

I finally weighed myself for the first time in the mission! I have gained 10 pounds! I was also wearing shoes, had my tag, planner, stuff in my pockets, tie, belt, BUT HEY! maybe i have gained 5 lbs.

lightning here is super cool. You can see it in the cloud coming. It lights up the sky. super cool! We have seen it a lot this week!

I went on a split this week with an Elder who is only 6 weeks more advanced than me. It was hard for us to talk to people and understand, but I feel like we had a successful day there! His apartment is super nice. air conditioning. end of story. We made pancakes. I bought stuff today to make pancakes.

I have learned something of obedience. How can we expect our investigators or friends to keep their commitments if we are not keeping ours? just ponder on that.

With an investigator Yeni, (jenny, pronunciation) we asked her to pray about the book of mormon and if it was true and just wait for a little bit and listen. Well we waited for no less than 5 whole minutes I am sure, but she was crying, and she could really feel the spirit of it! Then... she didnt come to church. But hey, its a work in progress.

It's fun to run into other missionaries or pastors from other religions. They all teach truth! They all teach good stuff! But its not everything! They are missing important things! Its sad.

No we do not have ensigns, and yes we have 4 other sister missionaries in our branch.

Well I am out of time. I have so much to say to you all! ahh,,, next week.

love you all, keep writing me!

Elder jake

This is my mtc district, the aaron district. 

Top, left to right.

Elders Reed, Eiker, Degn, me, worsham, baxter, miller

Holding our teacher Hermano fioramanti (love this guy)

Below, Hma sanders, elder page, and hma braunersrither.